Thursday, May 12, 2005

Fuck you ... it's all about me baby!

"Do I look like a blonde with big tits and an ass that tastes like french-vanilla ice cream? Then why you tryin' to fuck me?"

Just in case there are little children playing online I want to make sure I get the rules out the way. This blog is intended for my personal use and will contain a whole bunch of shit that WILL offend you. If you continue reading my blog, you enter at your own peril. Angry comments by limp-dicked, internet nazis will be smacked down with great and utter devastation so be warned. This blog will contain adult content (if you haven't figured that out yet numb nuts) with references including but not limited by the following: sex, drugs, profanity, bestiality, necrophilia, stupidity, ignorance, and my favorite - intolerance of anyone who's not me! This site is intended for adults and children whose parents do a really shitty job of monitoring their online habits (enjoy kids!). If you are reading this, no one asked you so any bitching, crying, or righteous indignation can be shoved directly up your ass along with my most sincere "FUCK YOU".

This blog may also include but not be limited to: endless jokes about Neverland ranch and , why I point and laught at fat people drinking diet drinks at McDonalds, why tofu and smoothies are joining Asian male group sex as things you'll never catch me doing, and a host of shit that makes me laugh ... also on the list would be things never to say to a stripper (I have money tops the list), why I would take VD over "Fried Green Tomatoes" or any Susan Sarandon movie, and why I think gay marriage is OK as long as there is gay divorce, gay alimony, gay child support, and gay Malaysian mail-order brides.

That's about it for my first blog. Oh yeah, and at any time please exercise your rights to close your browser if you get offended ... or blow me ... either way I win.

Coming up ... Want Happiness? Kill a Shrink!


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