My Life, My Promise

There’s no getting around it right now. Things are pretty down in my house. The good is that I am not so lonely as I thought I would be between friends and family and of course the cutest kids on Earth. To add to my wonderful life, I was informed by me ex-girlfriend that I am being taken back to court for more child support. She says it’s a mandatory review or some bullshit, but it’s funny that she knows about it long before I do.

So right now, Pam owes me a ton of money. Trying to make ends meet was tough enough before the divorce. Now, I will have increased child support for Lilli and new child support order for Caitlin. All the while, I have to figure out how I can afford a house, food, gas - which is insane since I have such a huge commute that got longer with trips to Washington, and find the little extras for the kids. Oh yeah, every now and again I wouldn’t mind eating.

What I really want is to move back to Washington; however, that’s not going to happen any time soon. I find it increasingly frustrating that my soon-to-be-ex-wife insisted we move to Morton and has already moved out back to (drum roll please) … Washington. I fucking hated this town before we moved, and I hate it even more now that I am basically imprisoned here. I had friends and family in Washington; in Morton, I don’t know a single person save for my soon-to-be-ex-in-laws. Thanks for that Pam; I really appreciate it.

So to sum it up right now: no wife, no money, living in a fucktard town, and very little by way of things looking up in life. The good from all of this is I still have my little ones and I hope to use this time – since that’s about all I have and that's not very much with my job – to forge a better relationship with all of my children. I love being a dad but sometimes I think I take them too much for granted.

Maybe all of this will be something that makes me stronger or better, but right now all I can think is how hard it is to get out of bed every morning. I also know there is at least two little ones who are counting on me and I always keep my word. I won’t let you guys down. Ever.